Post VJKCq6zdKBe

Hjalmar Holm Apr 21, 2015 (12:11)

An Aesop fable

I pupsoli ar i lisse*cere

Pupsoli tetaina lissecerenna i undupetenen sambesse mardandurwa, sortala talirya mi sa, manter milcave. Mal i tálirya ta púrea lisinen i uar póle wile hya lerie inte, ar *quórer. Íre fírer nainaner ”nai, *hwindar yar nalme, milmen fírexer”.

Alasse camna naicelenen, nwalya.

The Flies and the Honey-Pot

A number of flies were attracted to a jar of honey which had been
overturned in a housekeeper's room, and placing their feet in it,
ate greedily. Their feet, however, became so smeared with the
honey that they could not use their wings, nor release
themselves, and were suffocated. Just as they were expiring,
they exclaimed, "O foolish creatures that we are, for the sake of
a little pleasure we have destroyed ourselves."

Pleasure bought with pains, hurts.

*cere from Early Qenya kere ”earthenware, earthenware pot”
*quor-, from Early Qenya qoro- "choke, drown".
*hwinda, from the VQP, "foolish"

Tamas Ferencz Apr 23, 2015 (09:05)

A few comments, hope you don't mind

- you could use nuquer- in place of the EQ pete- (I confess I am uncomfortable with mixing very early words in a late-style text if it can be avoided)
- I think you are missing a possessive from *mardandur
- the pa.t. of mat- would be mante
- using bare adjectives as adverbs is, as far as I can see, rare in Quenya,  suggest you rather use the attested -ve or -ie suffixes (I'm talking about 'greedily')
- I don't get 'talo i talirya'
- the verb is in an unconjugated form after pol/lerta/ista so póle wile

- I think you meant hwindar?

Hjalmar Holm Apr 23, 2015 (11:46)

You are welcome with your comments! I am far less skilled in Quenya than in Sindarin, and I need plenty of help with my S attemps.

- First, I agree in substance of not blending in very early words, but when I find no other word to express what I want, I let the ends justify the means.
- I added -wa to mardandur
- yes, that's true. For some reason I conjugated it like mata-, but I corrected it now.
- now milcave
- talo wasn't really necessary, so I deleted it. I added the missing accent on tál.
- I didn't know how it worked.
- Yes, And I forgot to tell it's from the VQP